Sunday, February 24, 2008

Spoiler: No Country wins

Lead Actor. Man, Helen Mirren's gorgeous. I just wonder what would happen if Day-Lewis lost. Riots in the streets, I'd guess.
Depp's clip is great but it sure does stand out from the rest.
Tommy Lee Jones sure is showing his age. Maybe it's just cause I'll always remember him circa The Fugitive / Men in Black.
Mirren barely had to open the envelope before she said Daniel Day-Lewis. Hells yeah.

Commercial break. Let's see how I'm doing. I'm 5 for 10.

Right: Actor, Original Screenplay, Adapted Screenplay, Supporting Actor
Wrong: Supporting Actress, Actress, Costume Design, Song, Foreign Film

They're going through the Best Director montage. I think I've written more here tonight than I did in the last year.

Best Director!!! Ooh, I love that this can still give me butterflies.
The Coens won! Finally, some love for the men who created the Dude.

Best Picture: No Country. I guess I should probably see it now, eh?


Don't trust Workopolis, it killed Tom Baker

Do any other Whovians think of Logopolis when they see ads for Workopolis?

Cameron Diaz presents Cinematography, and can barely pronounce it. I can hear the facepalms of cinematographers 'round the world. There Will Be Blood for the mothaluvin' win!!! It sure as hell deserves it.

Hilary Swank introduces the In Memoriam reel.

Bud Ekins died? He was Steve McQueen's famous stuntman - he did the jump in The Great Escape.
Seeing Heath Ledger hit me again. I didn't even know him, why do I get so worked up?

Straight to commercial, because who could tell jokes after that? I'm typing this on my laptop and I feel like I'm getting a fever, the heat this thing is generating on my legs over a few hours. And I'm getting a mad headache from watching both my TV and my computer screen. Whine whine moan moan.

Amy Adams presents Score. Atonement wins.

The Pajiba consensus seems to be that Carell did indeed say "shit."

A bunch of soldiers from Iraq present the Documentary Short Subject. Thats a really lovely idea, totally non-partisan from my POV. Smart move.

Documentary Feature. I have no idea what's going on, I'm reading the comments at Pajiba still.

Harrison Ford: "Movies are made of ideas. And pictures. And words." He's presenting an award to writers and this was the best they could come up with? Best Original Screenplay, btw.
Diablo Cody wins! She deserves it completely. I really don't understand the vehemence of the backlash against Juno. You don't like it, fine, but to hate it so and to smear everyone who does like it?

The Pajibans point out that Brad Renfro was left out of the In Memoriam montage. Huh.

There aren't many, or any, words that rhyme with Oscar

Renee Zellweger, presenting Editing, says that some of the most important parts of your life have won Oscars. Okay. Hokey, but okay. But then the examples are the car chase in Bullitt, the fights in Rocky . . . I have an unhealthy love for Bullitt, but watching it was not the most important part of my life. It wouldn't crack the top 100.
Oh yeah, Bourne wins again. Roderick Jaynes, nominated for No Country? Yeah, that's Joel & Ethan Coen. I wonder whose picture that was that they showed for his nomination. Man, do they do everything? "Cathering by Joel & Ethan Coen." "Transportation by Joel & Ethan Coen." "Assistant to the Directors: Joel & Ethan Coen."

The honorary Oscar recipient has had an amazing career. Robert F. Boyle. He designed productions, or is it production-designed, for Hitchcock, yo! That's cred. I hope I look so good at 98.

Please, please, please let Wanted be good.

Macbeth can't get you through everything, my good lad.

Penelope Cruz's dress is great, except for the beaded apron/shawl thing around her waist. Know when to say when. She's presenting Best Foreign Feature. The Counterfeiter wins. I'd said 12. I'm 3 for 7, dammit!

Patrick Dempsey is nominated as "talented and handsome." A, we know. B, it's a little reducing, especially when he's introducing his own film. I think that isn't Amy Adams dancing, but they aren't cutting close enough to tell.
Now that I've seen all the songs, the one from Once is undoubtedly the best, but "That's How You Know" works so well in its own context.
Nope, not Amy Adams. That's kinda disappointing.

John Travolta dances on as the dancers leave the stage. I might like that better if I liked him better. He's presenting Best Song. Menken's gotta win, come on! Nope, Once wins. It is a great song. Wow, they weren't kidding when they said their relationship borders on the criminal. She didn't look as young as she does here in the trailers.
Aww, the poor girl didn't get to say her speech. They started playing, she stopped talking, they stopped playing but she was already walking away.

They're keeping the ad breaks relatively short, but frequent. I still don't think they'll finish at 11:30 as the guide on my TV says. It's 10:54 and they've 8 more awards to give out.

Oh my, they've brought Marketa Irglova out to let her say her thanks. Awwwwww.

One and a half hours in

Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill just riffing as they present Best Sound Editing. TWBB better win a Sound if they can't win Score (because not all the score was written for the film expressly). Nope, Bourne Ultimatum wins.

You know, you could probably save a good 5 minutes if you took all the big names out of the front row - I'm looking at you, Nicholson - and moved everyone up a row so the technical winners wouldn't have to bring a sherpa on their way to the podium.

Rogen and Hill present sound mixing. They're being very funny but I'm just trying to keep up here. Who knew Transformers was nominated for so many Oscars? Bourne wins again. Hey, why didn't Paddy Considine get nominated for Best Supporting? Paddy Considine rules!

I just went to IMDB to find Considine's name and DAMN they are updating that one fast.

Wow, Lead Actress! They're getting to that one soon. Wow! Marion Cotillard wins. I like it when they show all five nominees at once. Cate Blanchett let out a sort of big gasp, sort of happy, and then started clapping. Wow, that was moving watching her speech.

I totally forgot my guesses. Let's see, I'm now 3 for 6. I got Best Supporting Actor, Adapted Screenplay and Animated Feature. I missed Best Actress, Best Supporting Actress and Costume Design.

Colin Farrell presents "Falling Slowly" from Once. Why have I not seen this movie yet?!?!? The guy looks a lot like Damian Lewis (except, not in the picture in his profile. Clean-shaven).

I noticed when they had the clips for Best Actress that they aren't showing the clips in wide-screen; Alison Janney was just this disembodied nose in Juno. But now they've got a Best Picture montage and the sides of that are getting cut off as well. Are they presenting the whole show in widescreen and anyone who's not got a widescreen TV is just screwed?
I like that they aren't giving into the impulse to include famous lines in the clips, it's just silent save for the orchestra. Refreshing.

Oscar, oscar, oscar

"Peter and the Wolf" wins best animated short. It's got to be something to beat the Disney version.

Alan Arkin presenting Best Supporting Actress. He says the Golden Age of Hollywood is still around. There's hyperbole and then there's no fooling anyone. Tilda Swinton wins! I'm surprised. She says she's giving her Oscar to her agent. Um, wow? If I won an Oscar sure, I'd dedicate it, but give it away? Oh my god, she says Clooney wears the Batsuit under his clothes and hangs upside down. There is apparently no one on earth who dislikes that man.
I wish I had more to say about Swinton - I feel like I should hand in my feminist and film geek badges for not knowing more about smaller female roles - but I don't.

Alba hosted the Scientific & Technical Awards. Didn't she host those last year too?

James McAvoy and James Brolin reciting some very lame catchphrases, but they make it work, I think. They're presenting Best Adapted Screenplay. They have obviously staged clips of each nominee typing, which is also rather lame. The Coens win! Apparently their other Oscar is also for writing (Fargo). And I can't not put in my aunt's boyfriend's line about the guy who adapted Diving Bell and the Butterfly: "He had an unfair advantage! He has fingers!"
The Coens are very obviously shy. What with them and Katherine Heigl just about fainting from nervousness earlier, this is adding up to a very shy, rather brief awards show so far.

The Academy's president is explaining how the voting works. This is nice, I was just explaining it to my cousin earlier.

I wonder why Kristin Chenoweth is singing Amy Adams' role in "That's How You Know." The obvious answer is that Adams doesn't sound that good in real life, but that's disappointing. Plus, she already sang. I don't mind Chenoweth, but why'd they dress her in a dress the exact same colour - beige, for cripe's sake! - as the background?

Stop-Loss with Ryan Phillippe may not be a great movie, but their ads - especially the theatrical trailer:

is amazing.

Actual Oscars part 2

God, that was great. It does suffer without the woodland creatures, but given the backstage look at the "That's How You Know" dancers, I guess they blew their budget on that one. Amy Adams is stylish as ever, in the sort of dress that shows off her curves without being obscene about it, you know? I'd never think that song could work with a calf-length '30s-ish dress, but I was wrong.

I like the flashbacks to previous winners. Say what you will, Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones are pretty cute together.

Jon says they make catty remarks about what we're wearing at home during the commercial breaks. This makes me feel a tiny bit less guilty about my previous remarks.

Achievement in Visual Effects. Golden Compass wins. I got nothing. I think I'm going get some ice cream and pause for a few minutes. Cookie dough ice cream > blogging, every time.

Cate Blanchett presents Art Direction. Sweeney Todd.

Supporting, presented by Jennifer Hudson. Javier Bardem wins. Knew it! 2/3. Awwww, he brought his mom and he spoke to her in Spanish. And the way he smiled when they said his name. Awwww.

"Oscar's Salute to Binoculars and Periscopes" may well be the funniest guldarn thing I've ever seen at the Oscars. It is easily as good as, if not better than, the Will Ferrell song. (I can't embed it.)

They're doing a song from August Rush. It seems like cheating to have Keri Russell introduce it. Gorgeous song and presentation, totally beating Amy Adams right now.

It still seems a little strange to hear the phrase "Academy Award nominee Owen Wilson." He's introducing short live-action. I worry about that boy. My cousin just asked what happened to his nose, so I'm checking Wikipedia. Wikipedia is mute. What do we keep it around for, anyway?

Short bit about bees in movies by Jerry Seinfeld, which would have been funnier if Bee Movie had been bigger. Or I'd seen it.

Okay, now I'm onto the real thing

It hasn't yet. I really hope Jon Stewart's good. The man's talented as all get-out but 1) he tends to mug and 2) he has to temper his comedy. Same with Chris Rock. You have to ask, if they're going to neuter them what's the point?

There was a neat opening montage with Ahnuld driving a truck through Hollywood, but it had a weird double-vision thing going on. Couldn't tell what the hell was going on.

Uh, why is Jon singling out specific performances? That's a really bad idea, y'all.

Wait, he just said that Norbit blew. "It's not often that the Academy notices films that are, you know, bad." OK, I kinda love him.

Aaaaaand he's back to singling out individuals. Dude, wtf? And he's resorting to the stripper name joke.

He's talking about politics and immediately he's stronger. Which is great. But why, why, why? It's the Oscars. When I want to watch The Daily Show, I watch The Daily Show.

\m/ Joke about black Presidents meaning an asteroid is about to hit the Statue of Liberty. \m/

Costume design is first. I've got to admit, I like it best when they have a Supporting Oscar first. Elizabeth: The Golden Age wins. I'm 0 for 1. The winner gives a very nice, very short speech. Very classy.

First commercial break of the night.

Ad for The Other Boleyn Girl. I thought they weren't allowed to show ads for movies. Maybe the rules are different b/c I'm in Canada.

George Clooney presenting. Rawr. He's presenting an sequence about the history of the show. George Clooney, films, history, excess . . . it's pretty safe to say I love it.

A new media joke, which might have been pertinent in 1999, but they combined it with a Lawrence of Arabia cinematography joke. So - okay. You get away with it. THIS TIME.

Steve Carell may have said "shoot", but it sounded a lot like "shit" coming out of my TV. They're presenting Best Animated Feature. Ratatouille wins! Yayyyyyy! Go Brad Bird, but also, I'm 1 for 2.

La Vie en Rose wins for best makeup. I'm just kinda disappointed that we can't refer to Academy-Award winner Norbit.

"Happy Working Song." I'm just going to watch it.

Oscar blogathon part what?

Philbin's hosting. Why? At least Seacrest can take the piss out of himself. He's just told Clooney that everyone used to want to be Cary Grant, and now everyone used to want to be Clooney. Clooney responds that that's because Cary Grant is dead. I don't have to mention that I totally would, right ladies?

I am simultaneously blogging, checking my email and chatting with my friend on MSN. And watching the show. I don't know how real bloggers do this - it's crazy trying to keep up.

Holy shiitake mushrooms, Mickey Rooney's still alive?

I don't want to slam Daniel Day-Lewis's wife's dress, because this isn't a part of her job or anything, but it's really pretty unfortunate. Brooches 8 inches across and that sort of thing.

Speaking to Amy Adams: the interviewer mentions that she's performing this year (three times, I'd assume). I wonder how they're going to do "That's How You Know," since it's such a big sweeping, hundreds of people sort of song in the movie.

Now Regis is talking to a lady who's been to every red carpet since 1986. Awwwww.

Now they're showing the inside of the theatre filling up with guests milling around. I love it when they show background stuff like thhis, stuff that you wouldn't normally get to see. There's a really great book I read about backstage at the Oscars: Big Show: High Times and Dirty Dealings Backstage at the Academy Awards by Steve Pond. I'd recommend it.

Hey, they showed the PriceWaterhouseCooper guys! I love it when they do that. They always have these great big goofy smiles on their faces.

Oooh, less than 3 minutes left. I've got butterflies. I complain, I whine, I bitch, but god, I love the Oscars. As Brenda put it, they're our Super Bowl.

Oscar blogathon, part 4

The skybox is going over clothing. They've called Miley's (who it turns out is only 15) dress age-appropriate. NO WAI.

And they like Marion Cotillard's dress. It's white and covered in a fish-scale detail, starting small at the top and getting larger at the bottom. It might grow on me, but right now it feels too novelty for me, like it should be made out of vinyl. Hey, I liked Bjork's swan dress, who am I to talk.

I don't know if I like Ellen Page's dress. It's very simple: long, black, slightly blousy and gathered at the waist, with spaghetti straps. It's the sort of thing that shows off her natural beauty, but at the same time, come on! She's young, she doesn't need to be in widow's weeds.

Katherine Heigl: omgwtf. She's wearing a one-strap dress, fitted at the waist, extremely long and flowy, cherry red, with her hair short and curly and kinda bobbed . . . There's no words. WOW. She's absolutely gorgeous. We called my aunt's boyfriend down, and he always cracks jokes, but even he thought she was stunning. Red, red lipstick.

Back over to BW. My cousin is hiding under the blanket so she won't have to see Harrison Ford in all his [checks wikipedia] holy crap, 66-year-old self. I kinda have to agree.

Seacrest just offered Heigl a plate with his own face on it. Honestly, I have nothing to add.

Oooh, they're about to - no, no they aren't. Seacrest's show ended, and the paper said the show would start at 8, but no it's just another half-hour of pre-show.

Oscar blogathon, part 3

Jonah Hill and Seth Rogen are like adorable curly bespectacled twins.

Keri Russell is scary skinny. She's making me worried. She's wearing this insane grey dress, with a long, full train and a fitted bodice and crazy diamonds around her neck that suit the dress, rather than just looking extraneous. Oh, and her hair - this updo that looks a bit stiff but nice and big. Gorgeous, but a little frightening. Nathan Fillion needs to feed that girl some pie, stat.

Gad, stop blathering up in the "skybox." Flipping over to E!Talk Canada.

Gah, they're on Miley Cyrus again.

I like to think I've been dulled by BBC to tolerate all sorts of production qualities, but flipping from E (screw it, I'm not punctuating that anymore) to E Canada really emphasizes how much less money E has to work with. Much less rich in colour, poorer sound.

And now it's on the Barbara Walters special, going over Ellen Page's filmography. I can handle it when Americans are ignorant of Canadian film. I can't when they're openly disgusted by the fact that Canadian film exists. SARAH SMASH.

I'm only 17 (16 in non-leap years) days younger than Ellen Page! I don't know whether this is awesome, or makes me depressed. Let's not mention that Seacrest said by the time Miley Cyrus is 18 she'll be a billionaire.

My aunt's boyfriend just said that Walters doesn't like Page because she's independent and not sucking up to her. He's telling me to put in his theory that Walters actually died 10 years ago, and that's Gary Busey in a wig. So, I did.

I just saw an ad for Leatherheads (which I'm rather excited for). The studios aren't allowed to advertise during the actual awards, so why don't more of them advertise movies during the pre-show? The most frequent ad I've seen is for Grey Goose, which admittedly makes it look absolutely delicious.

Apparently Saoirse or whatever is pronounced "Sersha."

Quarter to, time to post!

Oscar blogathon, post 2

Seacrest is talking about eavesdropping on Carell in the grocery store. He says how inappropriate it would have been for him to approach him at the time and say he was eavesdropping. He tells this story on international TV. I don't even have to try to make the jokes here.

Amy Adams' dress looks a lot like her dress at the end of Enchanted, except it's a sort of very dark green-black rather than purple, and it's a lot more swirly around the calves. I normally hate that kind of bodice, where there's a dip between the breasts, but it still looks great on her.

John Travolta's hair looks like he bought it off a 2 AM hair commercial and he sprayed it on. Ken dolls have more realistic hair.

I'm tempted to say that Miley Cyrus's dress's colour (cherry red) is too old for her. Yes, it sounds very Grandmere from The Princess Diaries, but it's kinda true. The cut is perfect -

James McAvoy and his lovely wife are on. Me can't brain now -

Okay, it's off him now. Gosh, he's pretty. Seacrest is talking to Amy Adams about her Enchanted doll, same as he did for Patrick Dempsey. What, were they short of "Boy, you were really good in your movie. Who are you wearing? You sure were good." And Seacrest's correspondent just said, "It's like the less you're prepared, the better." You can't make this shit up.

Jessica Alba always makes best-dressed lists. Last year they talked more about her than some of the actual winners, even though she hadn't actually been in anything for a while, nor did she have anything coming up soon. She was well-dressed:

But it made me wonder if 10 years from now they'll just have models walking the red carpet so they don't have to talk about the boring ole movies all the time. Anyway, despite having a lovely pregnancy glow, Alba's dress this year just looks marred. It's this deep copper/bronze strapless empire waist, but it's got this big feathery boa just glued onto the bust.

Someone please get Jennifer Garner a sandwich.

Oscar blogathon post, 1 of hopefully many

Thanks to Sarah for inspiring me to get back bloggin' again. Thus begins my Oscar liveblog.

Anne Hathaway on Steve Carell: "He's just a very shy, bitter man . . ." Have I mentioned how much I love her? Shame about her dress. She's absolutely gorgeous, and she's got a ponytail and a dress that's cutting her horizontally in exactly the wrong way.

Saoirse Ronan is just about the cutest the cutest thing ever. She's got this gorgeous green dress that would be too Irish-cliche if it weren't for her stunning eyes.

James McAvoy arrived. He is very, very pretty. That is all.

What's with Seacrest's jacket? It's got this paler bit around the neck that makes him look like he's wearing a priest's miter.

I'm going to try to post every quarter or half hour. Punching the button now . . .

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Been a long time

Yeah, yeah, I know. But I've been procrastinating, and I saw Penny Karma's Oscar challenge. I think I'm going to try to liveblog the Oscars as well. Here are my predictions for the majors, and my rationale:

Best Picture:
No Country for Old Men

Best Director: Joel Coen & Ethan Coen (No Country for Old Men)

The Coens have never won Best Director - no, not even for The Grand Lebowski! I know! I think this is their year. Michael Clayton was lucky to get nominated. Juno is a comedy. Not enough people saw Atonement. That leaves No Country and There Will Be Blood for Best Picture. There Will Be Blood is the perfect example of an auteurist flick; it never could have been what it is without Day-Lewis and Anderson working together. So I think if they don't give the Oscar to Anderson for directing, he won't get it for Best Picture.

Best Actor: Daniel Day-Lewis (There Will Be Blood)

This one's already engraved on the statuette. I saw this movie last night, and he's everything you've heard and more. He will, in fact, drink the other nominees' milkshakes.

Best Actress: Julie Christie (Away From Her)

Big ups for the Canadian film, woot woot! I would've said Page but I think she's too young to win.

Best Supporting Actor: Javier Bardem (No Country for Old Men)

Haven't seen it, but this is another lock.

Best Supporting Actress: Saoirse Ronan (Atonement)

I predict this will be the "big upset" category. Ryan and Swinton are supposedly great, but I think more people saw Atonement. I'm thinking of when Anna Paquin won for The Piano here.

Costume Design: Atonement

That green dress is a character all by itself. I just hope they don't repeat the presentation of the costume nominees in the same way this year, with models in a tableau. It just looked awkward.

Original Song: "That’s How You Know" - Enchanted

I love this song. I love Amy Adams singing it. I love Patrick Dempsey's reaction. I love this movie. That is my only explanation.

Foreign Language Film: 12

Just guessing here. This is the first year in a while I haven't heard of any of these. I know: shaaaame, shaaaaame. I'm surprised Four Months, Three Weeks, 2 Days isn't here, unless it didn't actually get released in 2007.

Adapted Screenplay: No Country for Old Men

Apparently it's EXACTLY like the book, and the Academy's a sucker for that sort of thing. I love the book Atonement, but by its very nature they would have had to cut out about 75% of it.

Original Screenplay: Juno

There's no way Juno isn't going to win something. But both Page and Reitman are too young, and Diablo Cody's making a real name for herself. It's the first time I've seen so
much attention paid to a screenwriter.

Finally, Penny Karma's been having a bit of trouble getting people to respond because most people haven't seen many of the nominated films. I'm no better. So here's my completely subjective list of best of '07.

Best Picture: There Will Be Blood.

I didn't enjoy it, but I do like it a hell of a lot.

Best Director: Jason Reitman, Juno.

He took what could have been Napoleon Dynamite and turned it into a gem. The guy is obviously one of the most talented comedic director out there - Thank You For Smoking makes me laugh every time. If I had seen Away From Her - yes, shaaaaaaame, shaaaaaaame - I would have picked Sarah Polley. I've been a Sarah Polley fan since before I could read. That's fan cred, right there. And I have seen her direct before, so I know of what I speak.

Honourable mention to Adrienne Shelley for Waitress.

Best Actor: Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood

Duh. The only one who might have given him a run for his money is Cillian Murphy in Sunshine.

Best Actress: Keri Russell, Waitress.

I've already talked everyone's ear off about this movie. Basically, it's kinda perfect.

Honorable mention: Nikki Blonsky in Hairspray.

Best Supporting Actor: Paul Dano, There Will Be Blood.

How the hey-nonny-nonny did he not even get nominated? Folks, have you seen what Day-Lewis does to him during the movie? And he plays two parts, the larger of which he had to replace the original actor in after 2 weeks of shooting. It's Paul motherloving Dano!

Honorable mention: the kid who plays H.W., De Niro in Stardust.

Best Supporting Actress: Cripes, I'm having a hard time trying to think of one here. All my favourite supporting characters this year appear to be men. Hmmm; I'm going to have to go with Amanda Bynes in Hairspray. Not so much for the performance - she probably wouldn't make it onto a top 5 list of my favourite performances in that movie - but for proving that good roles for young female comedians/comic actresses do exist. I'm looking at you, Sarah Silverman.

Costume Design: I have no idea, but whoever dressed James McAvoy for Becoming Jane should get a negative Oscar. Ooooh, he's just a wee little leprechaun in a green velvet coat, thrashing aboot the forest looking for his luck charms!

Original Song: "That’s How You Know" - Enchanted

Yes, still the same. I think they should institute a category where films can be nominated for a non-original song. My example here is "Come What May" from Moulin Rouge! It was ineligible for the Oscar because it was originally written for Romeo + Juliet, even though it was never used. I mean, just because "Sea of Love" wasn't originally written for Juno, it should still be eligible for some award. You can't tell me there's no artistry involved there at all.

Foreign Language Film: No idea again.

Adapted Screenplay: I don't know - Hairspray? Sweeney Todd?

Original Screenplay: Hot Fuzz

This movie is a slice of fried gold, and I defy anyone to tell me otherwise. Simon Pegg, Edgar Wright, Nick Frost and Jessica Stevenson/Hynes could beat up a puppy in front of me and I would still think they were just about perfect. If Juno can be nominated, there's no reason Hot Fuzz can't be. Hell, The Full Monty was nominated for Best Picture!

Also, how did the hell did TWBB not get nominated for Best Score?